The Resurfacing of Joy
A few years ago, I found myself in a rather low place. I was struggling with my own identity, the trials and challenges of ministry, balancing family, and wondering if my joy would ever return.
 |
| Me enjoying The Book of Joy |
One afternoon, as I was perusing the new books at my local bookseller, I happened upon a book ironically titled, The Book of Joy. It wasn’t the title at first that caught my attention, but rather the two smiling headshots of Archbishop Desmond Tutu and His Holiness the Dalai Lama on the cover. I quickly picked up the book and found a chair to leaf through the pages.
I found myself immediately hooked in just the two-page invitation by the co-authors at the beginning of the book. They wrote,
“Lasting happiness cannot be found in pursuit of any goal or achievement. It does not reside in fortune or fame. It resides only in the human mind and heart, and it is here that we hope you will find it.”
I purchased the book and returned to my home, where sadly the book went on a pile as the reality of life and ministry returned to sucking the joy from me. It would be several months before I would pick up the book again and put it in my bag as I headed off on a personal retreat.
It must have been profound, because I still can remember exactly where I was and the view from my chair at the retreat center, when I read the following words from Desmond Tutu,
“We are meant to live in joy. This does not mean that life will be easy or painless. It means that we can turn our faces to the wind and accept that this is the storm we must pass through. We cannot succeed in denying what exists. The acceptance of reality is the only place from which change can begin.”
Most of the time, you and I are so focused on escaping the pain, hurt, and ridicule of the storm that we don’t see how we can use it for the positive. I was stuck for a long time – years in fact. I thought I had lost my joy and was at a place where nothing could help bring change.
During the three day retreat I consumed that 300-page book. I could not stop reading it. I found that Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama began, as Quakers say, speaking to my condition in a very personal way. Even though I had thought I lost my joy, in reality it was still just under the surface of my life. I was starting to learn.
It was an eye-opening revelation when I realized that my joy had been diminished not because of how others were treating me, but simply because of ME. It was I who was struggling to be grateful, lacking motivation, and no longer able to reframe my own story to see the joy around me. I found myself frustrated when I had to admit I was jealous of fellow ministers and friends who seemed happy and successful. I also realized I had been suffering from chronic stress that left me fragmented and not living in the present moment, and my expectations were not realistic and my ambitions self-centered.
My lack of joy was because of ME.
I lacked joy, because I was in the way of it returning. I had been approaching my problems with rigidity and reactivity and I had lost, once again, the ability to confront my life with creativity, compassion, humor, and acceptance.
The artist in me quickly put the book down and had me grabbing for my sketchpad. Expressing my creativity has always been a first step in the return of my joy. I was inspired to sketch out eight essentials that were speaking to my condition in the present moment:
 |
| 8 Essentials by Bob Henry |
These were not just buzz words or hopeful goals. These were the essentials that I now knew could bring back my joy. How I viewed and approached these essentials would gradually change my understanding of life and ministry and bring the freedom I needed from my joyless pain. Since that initial sketch, I have added several more essentials to the list, but these still remain important keys to me finding joy in life.
 |
| Tutu Joy by Bob Henry |
After returning from the retreat, I found my life and attitude changing and my joy returning. I made some personal changes and life brought other adjustments, but most of all my joy began to return…well…or just maybe I allowed it to resurface.
I continue to return to the wisdom of Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama in The Book of Joy. Last year, I was inspired to paint a modern icon of the joyful soul of Archbishop Desmond Tutu. It is how I imagine him responding to this interaction from the book about Tutu losing all his hair.
“The Dalai Lama erupted into a belly laugh and then began pointing at the Archbishop. ‘His face, his face,’ he said, gesturing to the Archbishop’s bald head. ‘He looks like a monk now, doesn’t he?’”
Comments
Post a Comment